Tag Archives: writing

Age

Does age matters? 

Yes, it certainly does.

No matter what others might say or want you to believe.

It matters in all sorts of ways.

I married someone eleven years my junior and my first husband was eleven years older than me. Though it doesn’t/didn’t matter to us it matters to the outside world and to the family. It matters physically in the sense of I/he was approaching middle age and starting to show and feel the telltale signs that belong to that age while he/I was barely out of his/my twenties. It matters psychologically/mentally as well. People constantly evolve and their preferences and mindset are constantly changing through the years. The differences are so apparent sometimes it can’t be ignored. It matters emotionally as well. How people react sometimes is a great deal depends on their age and the level of maturity. So is the way they handle problems and situations. Someone has to take responsibility and often times if not always, it falls to the shoulders of the one who is older and more experienced partner. 

Socially it matters as well. Your circle of friends don’t belong to the same generation and it can pose quite some problems especially in the beginning. Like with my ex-husband for example, I was still in my teens while he was already in his thirties and going out wasn’t a straightforward matter. We didn’t even have the same taste in music. We ended up leading separate lives.

It matters financially too. Not only career wise but the actual earnings as well. You can’t compare a salary of someone who is barely out of school to somebody who is more experienced and already has a long work history behind him. Try to imagine this: Your spouse is already on a pension while you still have a decade or more before you can take yours, or vice versa. I think it is not easy for both dealing with this situation. I have seen problems arise between couples once they reached this stage whereas before they didn’t have any problems at all regarding age differences. 

Deciding to have children when there is more than a generation gap between a couple is another matter to consider. I know someone personally who in his fifties married someone who was still in mid-thirties and had a five-year-old kid. See what I mean? No one wants to be a parent anymore at that advanced age. People might think it’s your grandchild instead. There is nothing wrong with that but going through with that stage (again) when all you want is to be peaceful and relax enjoying the fruit of your hard work instead of waking up in the middle of the night to feed a crying infant or dealing with teenager tantrums and late night escapades. No, thank you.

Age matters. It really does. Especially when the theories put suddenly to practice. And I don’t even talk about balding/thinning hair and sagging skin, gaining weight and declining libido and all that jazz.

So, next time you think/say age doesn’t matter; think again…

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Snippet

My blog? Snippets of random thoughts, ideas, beliefs, opinions, views, hopes, dreams and fears. No chronological order, no labels, no category. Just pure feelings coming from the heart. It may be vague and irrational at times but always real, honest and true. This is me on a plate without embellishments and trimmings, take it or leave it. It may not be everyone’s cup of tea but I don’t know any other way. I can edit my words but not my thoughts and feelings. And even if I could I would not. What is the use of having a voice and your own corner if you can’t say what you want? It is like whispering in your own house, afraid somebody might hear you. No, I can’t do that. I will always adhere to common decency and approach each topic politically correct but I would not dilute my writings so it suits sensitive ears and weak minds. I will never apologize for being myself. I know the path to freedom is not the easiest path to traverse, I have been on it since day one. Lots of hurdles but I can’t go off course, that would mean lying to you and to myself. I would appreciate if you walk with me down this road but I would also understand if you can’t. Not everyone is cut out for this journey. I will always be grateful I have met you along the way. These random encounters taught me a lot about life. I will continue this expedition with an open mind and an open heart as always. Maybe we will meet again someday. Take care and see you around…

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Droll

If it means quaint, odd, strange, queer, eccentric, outlandish, bizarre, whimsical, then that is me. Oh, I have my own unique brand of droll self-mockery also. I laugh when I feel uneasy, I laugh when I see something terrible or read about hardship and misery. I laugh when I don’t feel good and I laugh when I’m sad. I have a very dry sense of humour and I am pretty ironic. You can say I am a droll little girl.

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Gingerly

I learned to be cautious when dealing with people. Coming from an isolated background with only my immediate family for companions in an environment where no one had to lie and deceive to impress, we grew up as naive honest individuals with no boundaries; thinking that everyone is like us: strong yet vulnerable, what you see is what you get.

I (we) learned the hard way. The experience turned my siblings into one of them and they never look back. Somehow I managed to escape. Don’t ask me how. All I know is I turned inward and in that way protected my core from contamination. I am still struggling to survive in this world where hypocrisy and falseness are greatly rewarded. 

I did try to belong. God knows I did. But being a copy of the majority doing the things I loathe and finding myself further and further away from the person I really am is a too high price to pay. I have chosen isolation once more. I’m still living there.

Artwork-by-Kevin-Peterson-11

Daily Prompt: Gingerly 

Dancing

Vivian Greene once said: “Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass…It’s about learning to dance in the rain.” Sounds like a cliché (and it is) but by God, it is also true. We often encounter our true selves when faced with adversity. Remember the saying: When the going gets tough the tough get’s going? Another cliché right? But we all know that only those who have strong character and determination have the abilities to bounce back and persevere while others are left despairing and defeated when faced with life’s many challenges.

The truth is we have to learn to cope and survive if we are not ready yet to throw in the towel. We have to brave the storm and soldier on to come out on the other side in one piece. I admire those who managed and triumphed against all odds. It doesn’t have to be a heroic act (though I consider surviving in this world heroic enough) it could also be simply striving to come out from the darkest corner you find yourself in, crawl from the bottom and climb up and be the best you can be.

I know a family once who have lost a lawsuit regarding entitlement of some land and overnight they found themselves on the street. They have been evicted and their house demolished. The parents didn’t even have high school diplomas and their main income was based on buying and selling junks. Yet through hard work, resourcefulness, and perseverance, they have managed to weather the storm and come out of it victorious. Their children are all degree holders now and they are enjoying the fruit of their labor.

Likewise there was a boy who was so poor he used to wash buses in the night so he could pay his tuition fees. Most of the time he ate his rice with anything one peso could buy in his dorm room away from the other boarders. I reckon he was ashamed of his situation. Sometimes he played card games to finance his school projects. I suspected he even sold his young body a couple of times to get through high school. I still hope I am wrong. Fast forward to present day. He is now a civil engineer and about to settle down with his girlfriend.

You see now what I am talking about?

Haruki Murakami said: “And once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what this storm’s all about.”

I wrote a blog post a while ago about soldiering hardships and obstacles. I titled it: The Art Of Dancing. A mentor said I have to expand it. Give more examples (like I did here) throw in some first-hand experiences to strengthen the credibility of my claims, etc. etc. I know she’s right and maybe someday I will do it. You can read the article here.

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What Rhymes With Orange

They say none except for the half-rhyme lozenge which I think is a shape. But I don’t agree. I think there are quite a few words that rhyme with orange or at least will make do like arrange and disarrange derange strange and estranged prearrange disarrange multirange and all those ranges combination of words. How about rinse sense mince and lens? Does that make sense? What do you think? Can you come up with words that rhyme with orange? 

Alms Offering to 10000 monks - Chiang Mai, 2013

Express

Freedom of expression…

The right of every individual to hold opinions without interference and to seek, receive and impart information and ideas through any media and regardless of frontiers.

Sounds great right? How’s this translate in practice? Now, it is starting to get complicated. We all know that expressing your thoughts/yourself was never been easy, it is still not easy and it will never be easy as long as there are censorship, prejudiced and judgmental people who are stuck in their own ideas of what is and what is not and fond of putting others in boxes complete with labels. What the heck, you cannot even dress the way you want, come out the closet or choose a religion or political views without others riding your back. More so if we really are going to express our real uncensored thoughts. I wonder how many people say what they mean (and mean what they say) in daily life. In my experience not so many. And that’s why I am not popular. Mind you I know that there is a huge difference between being honest and being tactless and I would like to think that I am the first rather than the latter. At least I hope so.

Anything that associated with freedom (expression or other) is nothing but a myth in this world. Nobody is totally free. Think of mortgages, nine to five, duties, relationships, citizenships, religion, politics, anything and you will realize that freedom is just a fairy tale, a wishful thinking, an illusion; and freedom of speech, expression or whatever we want to call it falls in the same category. How can we express our thoughts and feelings out there when we can’t even say what we really think to our own spouses and relatives without fear of being an outcast? I know that people don’t tell their honest thoughts even to their best friends. Most of us are afraid of offending someone and nursing the greatest fear of being disliked. Image is all that matters for most. And don’t bother to deny it otherwise selfies and instagrams have never been created let alone become a hype. And before that, it is big houses (bigger than your neighbors at least) big cars, nice clothes expensive jewelry and private schools. You know the drill.

I wonder also how much truth there is in images that people are trying to project to the outside world. Are they really an expression of their true selves or a shot in the dark of what they think others wanted to see. On the other hand, if you care enough to project whatever it is to the public, that says enough about you isn’t it? Acceptance is the key word I guess. Deep down inside we all want to belong, or to be acknowledged or otherwise why bother.

Whatever our own personal reasons for doing our version of self-expression, I’m all for that as long as nobody gets hurt, go for it. Express yourself to the world and have a blast while doing it. Don’t be different for the sake of being different. Just be who you are and the rest will follow. But be brave enough to stick to your own path no matter what because I can guarantee you the ride will be bumpy.

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Loyal

… one of those dying virtues along with honesty integrity dignity devotion tolerance respect and so much more. In this world when partner and job hopping are considered fashionable and so many options to choose from, loyalty nowadays is as scarce as rain in Egypt and as elusive as anything when you want it. Based on what I see read and heard around, nobody is loyal to anything or anyone anymore. Except for pets (dogs) probably, but then again I don’t and will never know because I don’t have pets and if I would have it will not be a dog or cat but cute birds and (gold) fish, nothing larger. I’ve been devoted to my other whole for the last fifteen years. That’s the longest I’ve been faithful to someone. I hope he is the same but who knows. Anyway, it doesn’t keep me awake. He’s a big boy he knows what he wants. Let him have it. What about you, are you a loyal person?

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What Do I Care About

…plants. My plants. I care about them so much I often neglected my own needs and put theirs before me. They are the first things I attend to when I wake up in the morning (or evening, or night) even before I tidy up myself even though I care a lot about my personal hygiene too. I don’t care about makeup or beautifying products and only discovered the worth of a lipstick two years ago but I care about maintenance. I like to be clean though I hate the process of doing it. Too much ado and takes too much time. Especially lately when moving is not how it used to be. I won’t elaborate so much on that. Just imagine a machine way passed its time and you will get the picture.

What else I care about… writing. I do that first when it is raining (hard) and it is impossible to go out in my garden. I do it before drinking and eating and doing other things. I care about the books I wrote I made a copy for each of them on a USB stick and carry it with me wherever I go in case the house burns. I care about design too. Interior design. Cohesiveness and proper things in proper places. I care about design so much I will hesitate to buy anything for myself and feel guilty when I succumb to the temptation but I will not have a second thought buying anything for the house (or for the garden) I once spent fifty thousand euro purchasing things to decorate the house. I don’t do that (much) anymore.

Books… I care about books too. I can’t live without them. So maybe it is a need more than care that makes me treasure them. The urge is so strong I steal them from hotels when I’m on holiday. I will go to a lobby of any hotel check the book corner, take what interest me and replace what I took with my own books that I have read already.

Pictures… Images… That’s another thing that I care so much about. So much so that I back up all the copies I have saved in special folders. I don’t care if they are mine or others as long as it speaks to me I will save them.

I care about nature and animals. I don’t have pets but I care about them and hate to see them in captivity like in zoos circus and fair attractions. They belonged to their natural habitat. I believe they are happier there.

I care about underdogs, justice, less fortunate and elderly. I care about order, harmony, tolerance, RESPECT, and equality. There are so many things I care about and needless to say they are also the things that interest me the most.

Disobey

How to Write Bad Poetry:

Start with: SCISSORS

Scissors are very good cutting your prose

into pieces (as well as fending off mobs of real poets).

It works better if you start with

some imagery, such as simile

because if everything is there

in the first place that makes it like

a childhood craft project:

mindlessly cutting and pasting

fragments of thoughts,

searching for meaning.

(a cliché by the way works well,

And may I mention

Add some tension

through predictable rhyme

how simply (time, climb, rhyme! no wait….) sublime!

Don’t even try to count syllables, meter is forbidden. Ridiculously longer lines

Followed with

Short lines

For a

few lines

Really annoy people.

Choose whatever pet peeves

are in season, which leaves

Random

Words

Distributed

Across

The

Page

or web speak (LO and bad spelling,

Rules of Punctuation; whats that

It sounds as useful as putting

St*pid stanzas in my work.

I CALL IT FREE VERSE,

HATER!!

Don’t forget to sprinkle drama liberally:

 

Spellcheck wounds my page,

Like razor blades

cause they’re made

For cutting things ‒ duh.

I can hear my page sigh

I wish I could die

The world is black like my

black boots thigh-high

 

Create rhyme even if it’s grammatically incorrect!!!!11eleventy-1!!

Do you think they’ll notice?

Who created the rules, does anyone know?

Hi-ho, philosophical contemplations below

with my rhetorical questions!

(Is that a Pretense of Pretension?

unseen irony?! OH, NOES!

I did that last climax so fast

I forgot to close my brackets!

 

End with:

TWO FORKS.

Chances are it’ll give most people the shits (bad pun!)

but the forks don’t help with swallowing bad poetry. (and again!)

Chances are your worst critics will call it quits!

Instead, they will stick the forks into their eyes go postal, have suspended computer privileges and will only have rubber safety utensils from there on in.

That way you’ll never know how bad your poetry really was…

Shame, really.

Storage Note: Best kept bottled up in an air tight container as Bad Poetry Stinks.

(found this among my old documents)

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Enamored

… with the works of H. P. Lovecraft, Edgar Allan Poe, and Stephen King. I can sympathize with and relate to them personally. I might not write in the same genre but in the dark corridors of my head dwell the same horrors, the same twisted thoughts that are more real than reality itself. I adore this trio. I love how their minds work. They are the pyramid of my belief in written words, in the power of writing, in the beauty of story telling. They are the corner stones of my passion for creating tales, my source of inspiration. I will be forever in awe of their talents.

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Rhyme

I believe the king of rhyme is Theodor Seuss Geisel otherwise known as Dr. Seuss. Reading his works is like drinking champagne or a cocktail. Because it goes smoothly the effect doesn’t hit home at first sip until much, much later when you realize how potent actually the message is. You know what they say…bubbly gets you drunk quicker.

I used to do it in high school for pocket money, writing poems, mostly for lovesick teenagers trying to woo their crushes. I find that rhyming is the easiest form of poetry. Every one can rhyme. But not everyone can rhyme meaningfully. And in such playful manner without losing the essence intent implication and substance of the point you want to come across. And that’s where Dr. Seuss genius excels. I am not a fan but I’m impressed. And I give credit where credit is due. Here’s an example:

OH, THE PLACES YOU’LL GO!

You have brains in your head.

You have feet in your shoes.

You can steer yourself

Any direction you choose.

You’re on your own. And 

you know what you know.

And YOU are the guy who’ll

decide where to go.

You’ll get mixed up,

of course, as you already know.

You’ll get mixed up with

many strange birds as you go.

So be sure when you step.

Step with care and great

tact and remember that

Life’s A Great Balancing Act.

And will you succeed?

Yes! You will, indeed!

(98 and ¾ percent guaranteed.)

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