Yesterday after not speaking to me since she got married, that was three years ago, my daughter called me to say that she’s pregnant. I’m not surprised. I know from my son that she and her husband were trying to conceive. I’m happy for her.
She told me that I was the first to know. I’m not surprised with that too. It reminds me of three weeks ago when I was talking to my son after his musical/theater performance and he said that while he was presenting and singing up there he was worried if I was going to like the show or not. He thought I would find it banal. He was happy when I said that what he/they did was memorable. He hopes for the same effect when he finished writing his first book he said.
I know that my relationship with my children is far from ideal and we hardly see each other, but it is touching to know that they still value my opinion the most. Out of thousand of people watching my son’s performance, what he was worried about was what I was thinking. My daughter could let her father or anybody know first but she have chosen to call me instead. That means a lot to me.
In the past, they accused me of being hard to please and economical when it comes to giving compliments, but in my defense, I only give credit where credit is due. I don’t want to give or encourage false hopes when in reality there is none.
I know I will never be the mother they prefer to have and I doubt if I’m going to be the best grandmother but this is me. My grandchildren will know me like my children have known me_ honest straight-forward maybe harsh but fair. I hope they will appreciate the person that I really am because I am not planning to change myself for the sake of acceptance.
Let’s wait and see…
3 thoughts on “A Milestone”
Grandchildren have an amazing capacity to accept and love grandparents no matter what. Just please try to work some positive reinforcement in with them. My grandmother never did, and I still beat myself up as you do because she never could bring herself to say I was good enough. Love them and let them know their loved. Positive reinforcement doesn’t have to be praise for a job poorly done, but make sure they know you love them even if you think their art project of a still-life looks like a snarling, sparkly, purple pig that has been decomposing in the sun for 10 years. You don’t have to tell them it’s good, you can just hug them and say you love them. That was the part my grandmother forgot.
As usual it is nice to hear your thoughts about certain matter. I appreciate them greatly and I’ll keep them in mind. Thank you for your visit.
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You’re very welcome 😊
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