The Honest Musing

Sometimes when I look in the mirror, I barely recognize myself. I run my fingers across my face, and it feels like I am touching a stranger. 

On some nights, sadness envelopes in ways that I feel myself melting away, little by little. I have said things that I never thought I would, and I have done things that I never thought I would.

No matter what all the fucked up, popular quotes say, I don’t believe that anyone ever finds themselves entirely. I don’t think anyone ever will ever make sense of everything that is inside them.

And as scary and terrible it sounds, I think that’s part of the beauty. I think that’s part of the magic.

We are all shores, and we all change every time the ocean of life touches us, no matter how briefly. Maybe we are not the destination; perhaps we are the roads which go endlessly changing with time.

Maybe it is not about finding yourself. Maybe it is about being a mosaic of too many beautiful moments coupled with a devastating melancholy and the tragic sense of nostalgia…

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11 thoughts on “The Honest Musing”

  1. I think you’re right. Our journey is not a road that is connected. Some of them are not connected. They just happened with or without purpose. It’s like a mosaic that each piece has its beauty. I hope you are making piece that has its own beauty. Take care!

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      1. Music… I can’t dance, I can’t sing can’t recognize an intro of a song I have no rhythm whatsoever and the only time I listen to music is if I want to evoke certain memories with the songs that speak to me. Each song in my playlist is tied up with a certain someone or certain situation that will guarantee catapult me into the past if I listen to the melody/tune. For the rest music is just a noise to me. But I can appreciate musical people and wish from time to time that I can do what they can. I don’t envy them. I admire them.

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      2. My husband is the same way. At the beginning and end of movie when music is playing, he wants to fast forward. I said I’m listening to the music. Then when I’m ready to do something else, he listens to the Youtube on TV of songs that remind him of his old days and keeps asking me, do you know this song? I listen to classical, so I may r may not know the Country Western songs. We are okay with each other.

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      3. Talk of husbands, mine is the total opposite of me. He can’t live without music and he listens to it constantly. In his car, while working with his headphones… plays piano…His taste is so alternative the songs/music he listens to I didn’t know exists. I used to listen to classical music when I was young (before I hit puberty) out of curiosity. I outgrew the habit unfortunately.

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      4. And it’s good because otherwise life and the world would be boring if everyone has the same interest. Cherish and respect the individuality and the differences. I said to my husband: let’s work like a zipper, let’s fill and compliment each other.

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