Apology

I no longer look to my abusers with any expectation– of remorse, or apology or restitution or restoration or relationship. I’m at peace, accepting that they won’t and can’t help me out of the mess they created. – Christina Enevoldsen

I am still subconsciously waiting for an apology that I know will never come. My parents are dead. The last thing my siblings are thinking is apologizing to me I’m sure of it. From my wonderful ex I don’t have to expect anything aside from terror. Before one can administer cure to somebody, that person has to admit first that he or she is sick. The man I was married for twenty years would never acknowledge that he had done me wrong. Perhaps it is his manner of coping. Because if he has a single ounce of self-respect and conscience, he will jump off the bridge the moment he realized what he has done to me and to our children. But none is so blind than those who refuse to see.  

I’ve done apologizing to my children. I realized the other day that no matter how hard I try, they will never appreciate the sacrifices I have made so they can grow up more or less in a secure and safe environment. They are adult now. It is up to them to make the balance and form their own conclusion. Whatever it is, I will leave it at that. Truth will prevail.

One of the most important lessons I’ve recently learned? I have to move forward without that apology. Waiting on it has bound me to an anchor that is pulling me under. What would make the other person apologize for hurting me when they’re far too selfish to notice they have? 
― Paula Heller Garland

I will never apologize for the person that I am. This is me. Take it of leave it. At this point in my life, I don’t give a damn anymore what others think of me. Their opinions are not necessarily who I am. They never walk in my shoes so they are not in the position to judge me. I have my own short comings and mistakes, but who doesn’t? 

With me what you see is what you get. It maybe not everyone’s cup of tea but in my book it is better than to lie, cheat and deceive in order to be liked/loved and accepted.

They say: women live lives of continual apology. They are born and raised to take the blame for other people’s behavior. If they are treated without respect, they tell themselves that they have failed to earn respect. If their husbands do not fancy them, it is because they are unattractive. I know this to be true. It is always the fault of the mother.

Apologies are great, but they don’t really change anything. You know what does? Action. -Stella Young

I cannot accept an apology from someone who is doing the apologizing while continually standing on my toes. Repeated offense never deserve forgiveness.

I will not apologize for telling the truth but I apologize if by doing so I hurt the feelings of others. It never my intention or purpose. I will never deliberately cause harm to anyone. Friends or foes. 

These are my thoughts, these are my beliefs, I could be wrong but I will stick with what I know and feel. I will never force my opinions on no one and will never try to convince anybody to accept. I will never apologize for the things I believe to be the truth…

 

Daily Prompt