All my life I’ve been faithful to you. With everything that happened I never lost faith in you, not even once. I never questioned your ways and motives, I never blame you for anything, I trusted you completely.
But last year everything changed. I finally lost my belief in you.
I will not tire you with the boring details because if you really exist and like they say omnipresent, then you know why. Since that fateful day I begun to questions what I’m seeing. I am no longer a starry-eyed chick, naive and blind to your mysterious ways because frankly I don’t see anything mysterious about kids being kidnapped, abused in all possible ways, held prisoners in a cellar and starved to death.
Everything happens for a reason? Well, I want to know what is the reason why those innocent people have to die in that manner; decapitated, set on fire, or pushed from a building. How about those senseless violence against humanity everywhere? Do you ever watch the news?
Last year a psycho opened fire on a city square where I live. You know what happened next. Yesterday a driver ran over a kid on the street, dragged her all the way till there is nothing left then committed hit and run. Hows’ that? I don’t understand.
That you totally fucked up my life, I can understand and even forgive. Nobody can choose the family they will be born into, that I can accept. But everything that happened afterwards and still happening… sorry but it is simply beyond me. I don’t know what you’re thinking… Why bad things happen to unsuspecting good people and those who are outright evil lead prosperous lives and continue thriving.
Oh, I know… people do these unspeakable things to each other not you. But if you are truly merciful and loving God, why on earth you let it happen? In my country people say they are God fearing. I didn’t get it. Why should someone fear God? Now I finally understand….
~ Disillusioned Former Disciple