IF

Go back in time to an event you think could have played out differently for you. Let alternate history have its moment: tell us what could, would or should have happened?

Given another chance, I would not obey the wish of my parents to marry for money even though it means being disowned. I will run away, follow my own path, choose a career I personally want for myself, stay single and never have children.  I will travel the world, have affairs, and never let any man set foot in my industrial/artsy/minimalist steel and concrete with reclaimed wood for added warmth self-renovated loft with huge balcony/garden overlooking  the city. I will grow old with myself and save me the trauma of a relationship/marriage that was doomed right from the start. 

Given another chance, I will be me. The real one. The one that never had a chance to emerge and develop. The one who can fly and carries magic within herself…

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10 thoughts on “IF”

  1. Wow, I am beginning to understand how we as people in the midst of experiencing the tales that family tells , situate our lives to make those around us happy instead of focusing on what will make us happy, I totally love your memory of going back and changing yourself for yourself to be you unequivocally resolute. Thanks for sharing.

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  2. There are a lot of choices I might have made differently …? Yet I cannot find the will to set one apart. Those choices are what defines me. Good or bad.

    I’m happy within myself. For all the good and bad.

    Regrets abound but those are the things, I must live with and not one of those regrets can be changed.

    So, I must diminish and fade into the west …! ;-]

    Cheers Jamie.

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  3. Everyone has the easy answer but it is hard to do what is right for you, especially when you are young and trusting people who should be older and wiser. Then we all grow up and realize that parents are people who make mistakes just as everyone else. It is hard to be you when others may be telling you why you are wrong for being yourself.
    I hope you can continue to heal and grow and get close to being the you that you want to be!

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