Wet patch

I placed a comment on an article somewhere (I did not include the link because I have inkling that the author does not want to be dragged to this sort of discussion. The person is yet to castigate me for messing up the comment section) about what part of a daily life which is awkward or boring we tend to forget while writing and I said:

“This reminds me of the love scenes in most films. They don’t show that one has to run into the bathroom in fear of dirtying the bed, or sofa or top of the washing machine, etc. Really, anyone can testify to this if at least one can afford to be honest in public that nobody in their right mind stays in bed after the deed because it is simply gross! All that running juices and sticky mess… itching and all that jazz… I simply cannot.”

Someone replied to my comment and said yes indeed bodily fluids are often ignored except in comedic situations and proceeded to tell me about a certain song of Lily Allen mentioning a wet patch in the middle of the bed. I checked out the lyrics and planning to forward it to somebody (yes I’m naughty) but the actual song I didn’t hear yet.

I’m wondering why they don’t show the reality of making love in books, movies or in TV series. Perhaps it doesn’t go hand in hand with romance? Ruins the fantasy? Not Disney enough? Redundant? Tell me… 

I’m not saying include the running to the bathroom to wash in every bed scene but once in a while will be good for reality check. It will help us not to idolize and compare ours to what we read in books and see in films. It reminds me of fairy tales stories which media are feeding to young girls from the crib, giving them distorted ideas about relationships and life in general.  If you’re beautiful you will be okay. How about ugly ones, like me? No Prince on a white horse in shining armor? Not fair.

How about you people… do you rather see or not see those awkward moments? And I am not talking wet patch in the middle of the bed alone but all the necessities of being alive like wanting to go the toilet urgently while watching The Hobbit in the cinema, scratching, cramps, belching and allowing gasses from your stomach to come out through your…  you get it.

Or you prefer to keep it nice and sweet as not to ruin the mood thinking reality is bad enough as it is please give us something to fantasize about even though we know the painful truth.

For my part, they can show anything, as long as it is done tastefully…

DSC_3684UnmadeBedBBB

 

43 thoughts on “Wet patch”

  1. “As long as it’s done tastefully.”
    But who’s to say what “tastefully” is?
    But more to the point, I don’t think they show the gory details of “after-sex” because, while sex sells, after-sex doesn’t. I mean, they call it the climax for a reason. In any kind of story (you learn this in 4th grade composition class — if you’re lucky enough to go to a school that offers composition) after the climax you tie up the loose ends and you call it a wrap.
    Yeah, running to the bathroom may be part of the loose ends, but it’s nothing movie-goers or readers are going to plunk down their $12 to see. I mean, while you’re thinking of going to the bathroom during the interminable battle scenes of The Hobbit, you’d probably get up and go the minute they cut to where they all start relieving themselves on the battlefield. It would be realistic, but the theaters would all complain that their plumbing was being over-stressed.
    So, maybe the question is (a) whether movies and such are really about realism, or about being entertained and (b) whether we’ve collectively lost the ability to distinguish the difference between reality and entertainment.

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    1. There are films that entertained and there are that speak realism. We learned the rules so we can break them later, much like driving. If we are going to stay in 4th grade composition class kind of story telling, then we better not grow up then. Tying loose ends after the climax should include going to the bathroom to wash sometimes. Tastefully is tastefully no matter who say it, it only differ in grade of perspective. I go to the bathroom watching Hobbit or not when I feel I have to and don’t wait for others for cue. About collectively losing the ability to distinguish between reality and entertainment… perhaps I could agree with this judging by the kind of films they’re showing lately.

      Thanks for the thought provoking comment. Appreciate the truthfulness of it.

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  2. I think a little reality is good. It makes it real. I wrote about my protagonist being held hostage. When she had to use the washroom she used it to her benefit to keep them out of the room because she wasn’t well and it was distasteful. It was a way to try and escape. I just tried to be clever with the description to give some details but not every single detail to detract from the story.

    That song is It’s Not Fair by Lily Allen and it’s about him not performing in bed, by finishing too quickly.

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  3. I guess that I would like a warning: “Reality included”. I guess thats why I like English tv more than American though, they somehow seem more real. SShhhh dont tell anyone but the wet patch has never really bothered me.

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    1. Ha, ha ha! To each his own they say. if it doesn’t bother you lying on a soggy patch then I envy you. Maybe there is still hope for true romance then. I like English TV too for that and a whole other reasons. Thanks for coming.

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  4. One of my upcoming posts is about this very thing, well in the story. I know in reality its…”off to the bathroom!” right after sex, but in my story which is co-written with a good friend, they are both lying in it. And to make matters more ludicrous neither seem to mind. -giggles- That’s fantasy for you.

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    1. Ha, ha ha! To each his own right? Whatever floats the boat. I enjoy these kinds of read sometimes like “My best friend’s wedding” and such. Entertaining and heartwarming if it is properly done.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. This is hilarious. I can’t seem to put into words how hilarious it is, because I have revised this sentence multiple times, but thank you. I for one would love to see those awkward moments in cinema, mwahahahaha.

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  6. Okie so maybe I’m replying cause its early & I still haven’t finished my coffee …. to be honest ..I stay in bed … it gets to hot for quilts n blanked during 😉 hmmm .. oo I seriously should finish my coffee HA ..but I guess what you call sticky mess .. I now call Creative Juices ,,,, but I do hear you .. & yes in my late teens /20’s .. some 20 years ago now 🙂 .. I felt that way too .. having lived with a seriously over zealous mother .. until I found just who I was /am … pretty much everything natural felt dirty

    As for media … yikes … now the lies and spin there I do find Gross .. the greed and corruption that destroys all the beauty .. I find that beyond Gross.

    Good post though … I appreciate and honour your honesty .. & you sure are right when you say on your about page .. real life ..is much stranger than fiction .. that’s why I tend to use the word weird when I describe me or something about me ..cause what most people find far out there to me is just normal everyday stuff 🙂

    Now as for “ugly” ????????????????????????????????? ooo I’d best go write a blog post on really seeing ourselves .. Your a BEAUTIFUL lady .. & you have enough pictures here for many others to second that 🙂 but knowing it has to come from the inside ..and it feels to me this Beautiful blog of yours is your journey to you .. to you really seeing your own BEAUTY

    Knights n white horses … well it was my discovery that we have to be our own ..shining white knight .. horse n all … its the only way when TRUTH is important to us .. cause we can only shine even more with a partner that is also his own knight … two WHOLE BEings so to speak ..sharing … free and clear of the normal human drama … cause within it TRUTH isn’t truth ..its just pretence 🙂

    ooo okie tooo much LOL … It will be interesting to kinda get to know you Private Idaho 🙂
    Maia

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    1. First of all I saw this comment too late because all my comments landing in spam folder lately. I have no idea why. Seem aside from not working pingbacks and links, here is another glitz for me.

      second I appreciate your thorough comment, it means you really read that contents and did not just skimmed through it. yes I have an issue with self-love. Though I never doubt my capabilities, I have serious trouble with my appearance. To me I look like Pumba from the Lion King, same colour, same walks, same looks, even same smile. Don’t laugh.

      Agree about knight in shining armor which sometimes just a retard in tin foil. We have to be whole again before we can be of use to anyone. Too much baggage not good.

      Amen to the twist and lies of the media, that is totally another matter, maybe I will write a post about it someday. Thanks for being here and chatting with us.

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  7. Can I say ‘I love you’ ? I want to, after reading this 😀 I would love some ‘friends’ of mine read this 😉 to whom I am too bold bordering on weird 😛
    To them sex is about dark room, groping their partners 😉

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    1. Your last sentence reminds me something I’ve said to someone back in my birth country a long time ago. It was afternoon and I don’t remember anymore why the topic went to sex and he said something like finding it weird to do it with the lights on. And I said to him: Yeah right, with you people (forgetting I am one of them) sex is only in the dark with your clothes on.

      You’re welcome to share this blog with your friends and love you too for taking time to read this ramblings of mine.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. I left a comment yesterday but I don’t see it.

    I think a little reality is good. It makes it real. I wrote about my protagonist being held hostage. When she had to use the washroom she used it to her benefit to keep them out of the room because she wasn’t well and it was distasteful. It was a way to try and escape. I just tried to be clever with the description to give some details but not every single detail to detract from the story.

    That song is It’s Not Fair by Lily Allen and it’s about him not performing in bed, by finishing too quickly.

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    1. Eight of my comments landed on my spam folder. This happens more and more lately. I like the way you describe the song. I think if people care to admit the truth, that lyrics happens to most of us in the course of our lives. I agree with you about writing about reality but doing it tastefully and cleverly. Some people asked me why I can write about dirty topics without sounding dirty and no people disrespecting me. It is all in the telling I said.

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      1. Yes! Brilliant, that’s it exactly. I don’t really see it as dirty- after all it is part of life. But that way someone doesn’t stumble onto your blog and think they walked into porn haha.

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  9. Here in America we romanticize everything! I much prefer foreign flicks that keep it more real. For awhile indie films had everyone going to the bathroom or brushing their teeth which I got to say annoyed me, much like when a friend keeps talking to me from the next stall! Can I just have a moment please!
    I also thought “what is she talking about” when you called yourself ugly. I am my own worst critic so I can offer no counsel there – lol. We need to love ourselve more.
    Also, there is a lot more one can do with the written word than with a visual image, which is why the book is often, but not always, better than the movie. Its probably why we blog and not vlog?

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    1. I agree about books being better option with the exception of Tolkien’s (but that’s personal preference) I know I have a deep rooted issue about self-love/ low self image when it comes to appearance but sober and confident that I am about other things I seem cannot wrap my mind around this notion of I look like Pumba in the Lion King.
      Too much of reality is also not good, everything in moderation is the key I guess.

      Liked by 1 person

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