…mine is nonexistent. I can be pregnant, gain weight, stand on my head; they stay looking like a twelve year old might have under her shirt.

I remember an ex-boyfriend said to me once to cut half of what down “there” and put it up “here”. I broke up with him right away. The jerk! It took me only three days to get over him.

Sad to say, but he’s not the only one with the same opinion. A friend and neighbour once told me under the influence of one too many beer that I could have been “sexy” if I have a decent bumper. I told her, hers is nothing to write home about either. Good that we were both in drunken stupor or otherwise…

I myself have no real problem with what I’ve got. In fact, I’m thanking my lucky star that mine is next to nothing; at my age and after two children…if I have a huge pair, it could be hanging on my lap by now. I have to confess though that I almost never breastfed. I tried for three months but my milk wasn’t sufficient enough my GP advised me to stop and never do it again.

If I’m being brutally honest, the only thing I have a bit of trouble about are my “tips.” They are very pointy and huge and look as if they are always in cold. It shows even through my brassiere. (I know there are some pads exist for this sort of problem; tried them, no good, never again) I heard it’s a fashion nowadays, pointy nipples… I even saw one episode of Sex and the City where Samantha was wearing fake ones. It was hilarious when she removed and threw them in the middle of the party. 

Another thing is__ I hate brassiere. I have few lying around somewhere, but I rarely use them; only if I really, really have to. They’re uncomfortable and they choke me! Must be something to do with growing up and not owning one for the simplest of reason that I could not afford to buy them that time.  My first training bra was bought by my adviser when I was a freshman. She couldn’t  stand that her leading character in the winning school play would go on stage bra-less.

And I don’t even know why I am writing this aside from I’m suffering (again) from lack of sleep and feeling rebellious that I can’t celebrate my birthday because I have to work.. 


32 thoughts on “Décolleté”

  1. Ohh I so need to show you a post I wrote on bras and nipple covers urgh let me find it the shells are really really good Honestly and ps that rude boyfriend sounds an idiot good riddance 🙂 x


      1. In our family, compliments are unheard of. My ex said I am short, fat and ugly. I have been bullied when I was young that’s why I guess i have very low self-esteem and used to hearing bad things and in general don’t mind it anymore. What i see in the mirror doesn’t change what sits in my thoughts. I am saying this matter of fact-ly because I don’t want to sound whining. But this is the truth.


      2. I understand this. I have never quite measured up to others’ standards. Something happened at about 25 and I started saying, well I like me. And that’s that. But I know that that sticks with you, stays with you for years, that self-perception.

        There are days I don’t like me so much. And I am a beauty on the inside kind of gal. But I think you are pretty on the outside as well.

        Liked by 1 person

      3. You know what is strange… I never doubt my capabilities and there is nobody I rather be than me. I don’t see myself as intelligent or attractive but I don’t dislike myself either. And I don’t care what other people think also. It’s just I don’t handle compliments very well. I’m a bit paranoid as well about opposite sex. I always look for hidden intentions and motives behind their interests.

        It’s good that you have come to terms about your experiences. It’s healthier that way. I guess we all have some bad days. That when we look in the mirror we see something else than what other people perceive.


      4. The part I really related to there was the part about looking for hidden intentions. Wow I really get that. That’s hard to shake. I’m not sure if I want to. It keeps me safe.

        I suppose I could have a lot of bad days. I’ve been in a bad patch for a long time now. But I have to pull myself up because I can’t stay down there, you know? It’s dark down there and I wouldn’t want to take it too far.

        I could say more but not in this forum in public ^_^ but I suspect over a glass of wine we could understand a lot about the other.


      5. “That’s hard to shake. I’m not sure if I want to. It keeps me safe.”
        I’m with you all the way with this one. After a time it’s become a second nature to us.
        It’s hard to trust when your own flesh and blood betrayed you. If you cannot trust them, who can you trust?
        We’re in the same boat right now. I’m having episodes too. I know how dark and cold it is down there, been visiting the place quite often.
        You’re right, no one can do it for us. We have to climb up on our own, one step at a time and cherish the days that we see the lights because it’s so few and far between.

        I can understand your trepidation about privacy on the net. Pity that we live continent apart or otherwise a glass of wine between talks is a neat idea.


  2. I laughed. Great post. I, on the other hand, have waaaaay to much decollate and have since very young. My sister, on the other hand, has tiny breasts. I always envied her.


    1. Thanks to Terri. I’m known for swimming against the current. It doesn’t make my life easier but that’s me, I don’t know any better. Thanks for passing by. I’ts a small, small world.


  3. ‘If I’m being brutally honest, the only things I have a bit of trouble about are my “tips.” They are very pointy and huge and look as if they are always in cold. It shows even through my brassiere.’ – Some men love that, although I can understand that you wouldn’t always want to draw attention, but to me they look and sound perfect. Just perfect.


    1. I supposed to be flattered for I heard it already more than once but wait till you have them 😉 kind of strange looking anyway. Look like a maraschino cherry on top of almost melted sundae.
      Good thing you like those.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. We all look different – thankfully – and we all like different things. What you don’t like about yourself might just be what others do like about you. We all dislike things about ourselves and our appearances that others might not even notice or may be just what they like in particular. Blame the media for dictating what we should deem ‘perfect’, with airbrushing and the constant use of unrealistic and stereotypical models, and adverts for pointing out all our imperfections with outrageous claims of being able to fix them with cosmetics they want to sell us.
        Real people don’t conform to those stereotypes, are all shapes and sizes, and thank nature for that.


      2. The other day I was discussing with someone about women who don’t like humans as we knew them ten years ago. The talk was prompted by seeing an actress who is altered beyond recognition (no it’s not Reneè) she must had some botox and lipo of arms and some breast implants plus nips and tucks here and there. The result is nothing about her is cohesive. It is as if someone took different parts from different mannequins and assembled them together to become her. I kind of prefer what happened to Renee Zellweger better. She is changed beyond recognition but everything about her fits together. Granted she looks like totally different person but at least it is cohesive.

        Liked by 1 person

      1. normally i had the cleavage of salma hayek as feature image and my picture in bikini at the bottom of the post but for some reason, i am uncomfortable showing a full face image of myself online and the photos i have chosen don’t fit with the overall look of my blog page. so the designer in me can’t leave them alone. then browsing online i saw this picture of tarantula on a woman’s chest and i thought perfect! when my reason for living in europe saw it he almost had a heart attack. he is not particularly partial to spider 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

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